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You’ve got four months to go to come up with the best of best man wedding speeches, since your best friend asked you to be his best man. And you’re not sure speech writing is the greatest of your abilities. You are still coming to terms with him getting married and you guys not being able to hang out as you used to, but you also want the guy to be happy and if giving the best speech is part of that, you’re up to it.

For a month or two you won’t even remember about the speech; still got so much time. Then something wedding related pops up in a conversation and you remember. You make a mental note; maybe even scribble a few illegible words on a napkin. Your speech will be one of those funny best man wedding speeches. You lose the napkin.

Three more weeks go by and you start to feel the pressure that you finally need to get something on paper. So you plan on sitting down on Saturday, after breakfast. Great plan. On Friday afternoon your best friend calls you and asks you to help him move some stuff into the new apartment. Of course you’re happy to help. There was something you had planned for Saturday, but it couldn’t have been very important since you can’t seem to remember what it was.

Before you know it another week is gone, when picking up the potted palm trees for the reception it hits you right between the eyes: you still don’t have a single syllable for the best of all best man wedding speeches. Oh, boy. And the wedding is in only a few days.

Of course you can’t ask your friends for advice, they’d never let you hear the end of it. In the end you swallow your pride and ask your dad for help. He’s grateful for an opportunity to share his wisdom with you and gives you a bunch of ideas. You take careful notes, lock yourself into your room and go at it. Or so you thought. You scribble and scribble, page after page, then you get stuck and nothing sounds right. By now your hair looks like Einstein’s from trying to pull it out in desperation and you’re ready to give up and admit defeat.

Well, not quite. There was that old magazine that had a couple of best man wedding speeches examples, and lo and behold, you find the magazine. But they are somewhat corny, trying to be funny or just plain same old, same old. — If this comes close to describing the last four months of your life, it’s time you made yourself a plan:

When writing a wedding speech you need to build a skeleton or structure to build on and to fill out. Make a list of the things you like best about your friend and also about the bride. Also make a short list of a few good anecdotes from stuff you’ve been through together. Funny is great, icky is to be avoided and always keep the bride’s feelings in mind (and with that also the grooms feelings and dignity).

Begin focusing on the couple and point out some of the things that make them a great couple. Follow that up with a sweep through the past, from when you first knew your friend and uncover some memories to share with everybody (don’t forget: tasteful and funny). Then you could go over the first moments in the couple’s relationship from your own perspective (stay with the official version). Throughout weave in nice details about the bride and the groom. Project their happy future together and your very important part in that and . . . close with a witty toast. Altogether, don’t go too long. Short and sweet is always best.

There, you’ve got yourself a structure. Fill it in with your experiences and you’ve got yourself a concise and structured best man wedding speech. A word of advice: When doing best man wedding speeches never embarrass anyone. It would pour a bucket of cold water on the celebration and could put a dent into your friendship. Stay on the bride’s good side and you will pave the way for a long lasting friendship with the both of them.

To find out more about how to write best man wedding speeches, visit Jared Wilmers’s site on how to choose the best best man wedding speeches for your needs.